as much as i’ve enjoyed learning interesting new things and meeting some p chill people im really glad tomorrow’s my last day at this internship. been terrified p much the entire time about making some terrible mistakes and alienating myself and im really really ready to not feel like im gonna do that anymore



the wind has five panic attacks a day
and scribbles itself as a body
as a frozen lake that you walk across every time you speak

breathing shouldn’t be this hard
is the wind’s motto

the mirror image of that is you whispering
into a microphone you made from your own hands

you say great
you say my brain is broken
you say i am trapped in a place
full of systems that want me dead
made by people who want me dead on a screen in front of them


it sure feels like something to be under the sky like this

breathing and breathing and breathing
but taking in nothing



how do you feel at a swim meet?
like a train switch I forgot to schedule?
or a little like a centipede circling
the rim of a mason jar? i hear insects
know the meaning of forever.
i hear insects are easy to squash.

poolside, a quiver of shadow swims
with more precision, born in circles,
your hand’s lifelines dipping in,
shaking off the loose energy.
back then your skin stretched
like it does when coated in flour.
somehow people drown
when they look beautiful.